So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
How's work?
Spinning.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
