Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
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