The maid of honor just puked.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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