so that wasnt chicken after all
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
