put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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