I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
i dont even know how to be here
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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