why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
