I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Randomize