He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
