It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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