Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
