This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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