Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Small penises have feelings too.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
