matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize