R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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