If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
