dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
