Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
