We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
