Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
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