remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
