I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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