I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize