so explain again why im purple
no
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
