this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
your like the ambassador to my penis.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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