I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
