I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
You did what with his pubic hair?
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