you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
She needs sedatives and a leash
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Randomize
