I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Randomize