I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
