she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize