I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
