i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Randomize
