then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I just gargled with NyQuil
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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