did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
You had me at "let me see your balls"
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
