I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
