Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize