Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Randomize
