Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
