I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
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