i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
ttyl tear gas
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Randomize