stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize