Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Randomize
