I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Pants are for mortals
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
