she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Randomize
