Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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