Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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