If that was your dad, he is hot
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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