im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
