it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
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