when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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